We all knew it had to come. The end of the vacation. Inevitable like bad pop on MTV. It has been a nice 5 days. I just... don't want them to end. At all. But there is no escaping. Back to work tomorrow. And a rough start. Fitness at 10. I have had an unhealthy vacation. Time to get working hard again. And at 13 I have to see Charlotte the psych. So it will be a fun day. *Beats the loud SARCASM drum*.

The weather is warm. I need a new summer jacket. I need new glasses. I need to get an appointment with the doctor. I want to bury my head in the sand.

Frustration sinks in. We have many things in common, name 3. I want to rip something apart. Want to fight?

I threw a CD on the ground. I was angry at my mother. I don't really have a bad temper. But sometimes I get this enormous swell of frustration and I get the urge to lash out. To destroy something. To be destructive. I'm usually very sweet and quiet and docile like a sloth on drugs. I wouldn't hurt a fly. I couldn't.

I just get frustrated. Tired of fighting for everything. Tired of being tired. And sore. Everything feels like such a struggle. Is it so much to ask for, to have everything handed to me on a silver plate? I would even accept a normal plate. Heck a bowl would be fine.

Woe is me.

I just...

I feel like I don't have the energy to keep fighting, it would be so much easier to give up. I wonder how humanity keeps going. It would be much more natural if we all leapt off the cliffs like lemmings. It's a good thing reproduction is so much fun.

So anyway. On that cheery note. Here are the results of yesterday's poll (including my mistake in the title, whoops):

That are your deep thoughts on the afterlife?

I believe in a heaven and hell bible-style (or whatever religion applies) (0) 0%
I believe in a heaven-like afterlife but not in a religious way (1) 9%
I believe in reincarnation, when I die I will be reborn (1) 9%
I don't think anything happens when I die, it's just all over (6) 55%
pizza (1) 9%
We all come back as ghosts (0) 0%
I really have no idea and there's no reason to speculate since there's only one way to find out for sure... (1) 9%
I think when we die we come back as characters in bad hollywood movies (0) 0%
The answer, my friend, is blowing in the wind (0) 0%
Other (leave it as a comment) (1) 9%

So the general conclusion must be that death is the end. Always look on the bright side.

I am a strange blend of ingredients.

When we kiss
I see what’s in your heart
You love me, yes you do
You don’t need to tell me
I know you love me most
No one else take my place
You need me, you do
Forever and ever

Baby Love Child by Pizzicato 5. As seen on Futurama. Leela's Homeworld. I love when Futurama gets all emotional. They have 3 episodes that make me cry. That's more than every other cartoon in the world put together. I think.

Here endeth the lesson. I apologize for my mood swings. It's just hard being pregnant. When you're a guy and all.

np: rem - these days (860906)