Happy birthday Sam :)


...so nothing really happened today. I spent my time uploading mp3s that were deleted. It's why I love life.
cause knowing is its own answer
My mother started pushing about why I'm not doing anything etc. Asking if I shouldn't talk to my caseworker soon. Hehe. See, I don't tell her anything. She thinks I'm just lazy. Which is soooo wrong. But ehm. Yeah. Sooner or later I suppose I'll have to explain all about the social phobia and all that crap. Or maybe I should just kill her and saw her into little pieces and bury her in the backyard then when peter comes home the next time I'll do the same to him and when my dad comes home in a couple of weeks I'll tell him they're on vacation and then I'll put posion in his coffee and chop him up too and feed him to the worms that by now will be used to living on a diet of human flesh.
breathe in .... breathe out
Yeah.
can you hear the silence of the plumes?
I wonder if I can borrow a hacksaw from the neighbours... Maybe invite them round for coffee.
as I often do
I swear I'm not a psychokiller. It's only in my mind.
remember it's all in your head
Blood, blood. Everywhere blood.
swimming in a crimson sea
Ahem.
junkee see
Nevermind. I'm bored and boring. And you know what that means....
alltogether now
HOTSPAM MAILS!!!!
the fun never stops at plume
Yes, it never gets old. And it's a damn easy way to fill up an entry and maybe collect some cheap laughs.
how low can you go?
And yes, it's now a regular feature.
the joke never wears thin
From the boypumpkin files I give you:
a glimpse into my mailbox
Amazingopportunity@m... - ****IMMEDIATE ATTENTION REQUIRED***** (I'll get back to you on that...)
woodman2@usa.net - Clark Kent Or Superman You Decide.....Viagra (Look! In the sky! It's a super-erect penis!)
donna3409@hotmail.co... - things could not get any worse... (Famous last words...)
natalie3020@hotmail.... - these are the plans... (Okay, boss!)
attract_@excite.com - Sexually Attract Women Instantly! (What makes you think I don't already do that? ...but for the sake of arguement tell me more...)
excellent.credit@exc... - Establish A New Credit File! It's 100% LEGAL!... (You know... if you have to use an exlamation point after "it's 100% legal".. I just don't think you're the guy who should handle my finances)
milky@tari.tari.it - hey!!! (It's the fonz!)
Herbal00274518@ccmma... - Finally, there is A Dream Come True Product (I told you already... I don't like green ketchup)
dpksefkjbf84716@msn.... - YOUR 2 FOOT LONG COCK!!! (Yeah, what about it? *giggle*)
bjorn_s_slaatto@hotm... - Britney Spears Gives Good Head (Bjorn... Bjorn... sounds familiar.. I bet all pervert swedes are named Bjorn...)
bodymelt.off@virgin.... - "MELT EXTRA POUNDS AWAY" (You mean I can learn how to walk on red-hot coal AND lose weight at the same time?)
cavalenti@msn.com - Are You Tired Of Being Sick? (No, I'm sick of being tired. Now f*** off)
jennaop@bigfoot.com - hey sexy (Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha)
say my name say my name you're lookin kinda shady
Taadaa. The end.
...is the beginning is the end
Okay so it's never as fun the second time. Let alone the third. But blame the people sending me spam. They need to be funnier. Stay tuned for the next instalment in Plume's Eye-opening Look at Vicious Irritating Spam.
pelvis. Haha. I crack myself up
I better go. NOTE TO SELF: Buy ratpoison tomorrow.
or green ketchup
Uhm. We have rats. And stuff.
meow. catkillas
G'night copkillas
stars beginning to fade
np: james iha - summer (991030)