Pardon my momentary relapse yesterday. Satan has left the building.

A kinder, more gentle being. With iced lemonade.

Today went by without too much fuzz. Work was quick and dirty. But I cleaned it up. Returned the videos from yesterday. Stopped off at the bank too.

I got money back from the Danish IRS. My big, fat greek check. Well, it's not greek and not that big or fat. But adequate. I paid too many taxes last year. 1700 kroners in my pocket. Good stuff. I was talking to Skye about it and I mentioned that time 3-4 years ago when I got a huge check back from them. I loaned the money to my parents and we bought this very computer for it. Skye mentioned that it was the start of getting better. I never really thought about that. What if I hadn't gotten that big check? What if we didn't buy the computer, what if I didn't meet Skye, didn't get a diaryland diary. That tax check probably saved my life. Funny that. I can barely remember an existence without internet. I remember having my ancient 486. And then I lost touch with all the guys from school so I didn't get any new games, didn't stay informed with the technology. It's still standing next to me here, my old 486. Not worth much. Especially since the bios battery is dead. But it became obsolote pretty quickly and it must have been 5-6 years or something before I got this new computer. Or 4-5 years. Or whatever. They were spent mainly in my room, mainly inside, mainly alone. And now things are really changing.

I can't help but wonder what would have happened if that check hadn't come. Would I still be sitting alone in my room all the time? Would I be dead? God knows I wished for that all the time. It's funny how little random things like paying too much in taxes can turn around and change your life.

I hope I won't be visited by 3 ghosts tonight. I really don't want to see what the world would be like without me or anything like that. I promise.

Oh no, those were the ghosts of christmas past, present and future, right? That has nothing to do with anything.

I wish it was christmas, though.

Oh well. I got iced lemonade, I can't complain.

And it's weekend. Schweet. I'm going to relax like I relax every weekend. Amazing that it never gets boring. And there's a huge soccer game on Sunday. Game of the year. Until the next one. FCK-Brøndby. Local rivals. Top teams. If we lose we won't really have a chance of reaching them. If we win then we're one point behind them and the season will be all open. It's exciting, I tells ya. I predict brøndby will play beautiful football and lose to the lucky machine players of FCK. But I'll cross my fingers. Brøndby deserves the best.

And so on.

My Eels mix is almost done. I love making mixes. Haha. I love music. I love the way you love me right back, baby.

It'll be okay.

np: eels - susan's house (970824)