We all fail. To err is human to forgive is divine. And we're all human and god doesn't exist.

We all fail.

everybody hurts

you're not alone

we're all alone

all the world must know

To-do list:
1 Buy chocolate
2 Buy plane ticket to England
...ooops, that was meant to go in my private journal, haha. It's an inside joke. You don't get it, unless you're on the inside. I'm not saying it's funny if you're on the inside, but at least you'll get it... huh? Who let the dogs out? I'm funny. Every body says so. Well they don't actually say I'm funny they just laugh whenever I'm near. I take that as meaning that I'm funny.... hmmm?

be yourself, don't be yourself

and we don't even care...

oooooooooh. Waiting. Waiting for the end. I wonder what it'll be like. Grand and exciting or slow and boring. Or somewhere inbetween. Our thoughts and visions. blabla. I try so hard to sound so important but there's no meaning behind it all. I lost my potential long ago. Now I just pretend that there's still something worthwile in me. blabla. Pity me as I pity myself. I know you better than you fake it... "Look, the emperor isn't wearing any clothes!", damn kid...

I went to ye olde shoppe this very mourning. It was uneventful. The shop wasn't hit by an asteroid, bruce willis didn't show up. There's a lot of foreign people living in the area around the shop. I'm not sure how to say foreign people in English without it sounding slightly racist. People of other ethnic background than Danish. That sounds even worse. Well, you get the picture. And an old woman who couldn't speak Danish asked me for help with some oranges. There were these bags of oranges and a sign that said 10 kr. So she asked me if the oranges were 10 kr. Which I confirmed. I could get used to interacting with people, haha, it went so well. They should bloody well pay me, that shop. I'm like the helper-guy... and my consumation of soda means they make so much money that they'll soon buy their own weapons factory in Gambia. And then we'll have a third world war and a lot of nuclear bombs will explode everywhere which would suit me fine. It would be cool, a post-nuclear scenario with mutants and all. Yeah, I could get used to that. But I think I wandered off-topic there. And I managed to forget that I was making a tape for the Essex beauty which means that I let it record too much. So know I'll need to go back and stop the tape and that means that there'll be a little slight noise between 1979 and In The Arms Of Sleep. I suck, but hey you get what you pay for. :-). Oh well it's a tape, not a cd. It won't be perfect. And I can't even put all my mp3's on it. Too bad. It's almost strange listening to all my pumpkin cd's again. I've been so used to listening to the songs I download on the computer. Live and unreleased and b-sides and rarities. Nice to get into the mainstream. But some of the very greatest pumpkins songs are the unreleased ones. At least unreleased on cd. At least not on any cd's I can get my hands on. So I can't put them on the tape. But it'll be a great tape. Really. I'm so insecure, I'm already sure that it'll be crap and disappointing and she'll laugh in my face. But she's too nice to do that, right? Riiiight? Maybe I should just get the tape done before I envision disaster and humiliation. Oh it's so hard too, choosing 90 minutes of pumpkins music. I could easily make another tape. And another. And another. And another. And another. Right now I'm actually considering cutting For Martha which is one of the sooo best songs, but it's also more than 8 minutes. So do I take one fantastic brilliant wonderful song or 2 fantastic brilliant songs? Life is full of hard choices, tough decisions.... Oh dear oh dear...

Storytellers is out. Smashing Pumpkins' Storytellers perfomance. The complete Performance. THE FULL UNCUT THING. All the stuff that didn't make it to the screen, all the stuff that VH1 cut. It's out on mp3. Ooooooh, yeeeeaeaaah. It's so cool being a smashing pumpkins fan, there's tonnes of stuff on the web... live stuff, demos... so much. I need that 30gb hard drive soon. And I need those storytellers mp3's.. I want my MP3ZZZZ!!!!

There are some things I'll live without, but I want you to know that I need you right now. Suffer my desire. Suffer my desire. Suffer my desire for you

I was reading doll-hair's diary and it just occured to me that I haven't listed Nirvana as one of my favourite bands on my analyzer (sign it dammit). D'oh, they're awesome.... Maybe sleeping with Courtney Love makes a man become a brilliant songwriter... Kurt... Billy... the list goes on. Or not. But I'd fuck her. Only to test the Brilliant Songwriter theory of course. That's the only reason. But Nirvana's orsome, d00d. I got all theyre cd's. I'm the guy who loves to sing along, but I don't know what it meaaans, yeah I don't know what it means. etc etc

mmm. Watched Hackers today. Kinda liked it. Some of the computer stuff was a bit ... silly. But Angelina Jolie.. mmmm.... What guy wouldn't want to have her kneeling before him? Those lips, mmmmm.... right, horny as I ever was. I apologize to females everywhere, but I can't help it. I'm a sick pervert (and I'm still sorry, I'm still so sorry). I'm the kinda guy that makes Anna Kournikova the best paid and most famous tennis player even though she's never won a tournament. I'm a bad wittle boy.

yes yes, I'll die with a hardon...

I need a masturbation hotline...

groan

g'night, don't forget I can't live without you, even if I gross you out

np: Pumpkins - 1979 (cool kids never have the time)

...who am I to need you when I'm down, and where are you when I need you around...